We all know that Valentine’s Day is coming up in less than a week. However, sometimes men just don’t notice or maybe they just are procrastinating, I’m not sure. I do know though that some men are wonderful romantic and get it, some men are ok at the whole event, and then there are others who struggle. My Hubby falls in this last category usually.
It’s not to say that Hubby doesn’t try, he does, really. I think that he honestly just doesn’t get it though and I honestly think my expectations are too high also. I am the dreamer type – I want that incredibly romantic dream that you see in the movies type thing. To be truthful though, that really isn’t us to start with so why I would expect it to be different on Valentine’s Day or on our wedding anniversary (the day after on Feb 15) I don’t know.
What I have learned is that Hubby needs hints, and well sometimes, I just have to even hit him over the head with it even! I have to do this with just about any holiday with him. I used to resent it, but now I’ve come to realize it’s partially my fault. What helps him do better and me feel better about hints/hits is that I offer multiple ideas up to him. This way he actually picks things out of a group so I am partially surprised still.
So how to leave hints and hits? First think about what you want. Then find sources for it – some guys require a little more help than others. You know how yours is already, do what he needs. Be as subtle as you like or as obvious as you like, whatever works for you and your guy!
Some ideas to get you started:
- Want flowers? Find pictures of what YOU like. Not everyone wants roses (they are my favorite though all year round). Find advertisements in the newspaper, online, etc. and print them out, cut them out, or email them to your guy. Again, be as specific as he needs. If you want him to stay in a certain budget then give him pics of things with the prices on them. If you print something out hang it on the fridge, the mirror, put in his underwear drawer, etc.
- Would you rather have some jewelry? There is such a vast array of jewelry available and you need to let him know what you like. Do you wear only gold, only platinum, or only silver? Make sure he knows! Don’t like the tacky heart shaped stuff that is everywhere this time of year, make sure he knows it. Again, pictures will help tremendously! If your guy is internet savvy try making a wish list on a jewelry site and emailing it to him even.
- Would a romantic dinner out be more to your liking? Pick your favorite spots, pick up menus if you can, leave the phone number if you need reservations. Say things this week at dinner about how wonderful a night off from cooking would be, or how you would so enjoy the fabulous pasta at such-and-such restaurant.
- Want some sexy lingerie? It seems what men think looks good on us and what we think looks good and we feel comfortable showing off are two different things. Sizes are important here – be sure he knows what size to buy. Call your favorite local store and ask if you can make a wish list with them and then send him in on his own to pick what he likes out of your list.
- Even if your budget is $0 this year, you can still give hints. Would you enjoy spending the night in and having a romantic picnic dinner in the living room and slow dancing? Get the picnic basket out for him so he knows where it is. Put in your favorite CD. Whatever it is – just help a guy out.
On top of showing him what you DO want, sometimes you need to show them what you do NOT want. It’s ok to include pictures with a big red X on it also to show him what you really don’t want. I mean honestly you may want candy and you are thinking a big heart shaped box of Godiva truffles and he just buys a box of those antacid conversation hearts. Not the same thing at all!
Some of you may be thinking it’s the thought that counts and don’t be so damn picky! I agree that it is nice the guys want to get us something, but they also really do want us to be happy with what they get for us also. Some of them just need a little help. We all want Valentine’s Day to be a good day and really enjoy what we give and get for each other. Part of your giving is helping him be a good getter!
Remember though, in the end, all you need is love!