I am 42. My husband had a vasectomy years ago. No more babies for me. This makes me sad. I really am struggling with baby envy right now. Not just baby envy even, but young children envy. My son is 17 and just does not need me like he used to. I feel like my mom time is ending, but I do not want it to at all. Do you ever feel that way? Like you have a lot more momminess left in you?
If it were up to me I would actually adopt some kids. To me it would not matter if they were infants or not even. However, Hubby and T are not on board with that at all – they both want nothing to do with expanding our family. Without everyone being willing it just is not possible sadly.
So many of my online friends are sharing that they are newly pregnant lately. I am so thrilled for all of them, but very envious at the same time. Not that I really am great at being pregnant, but just the fact that they get to experience starting at the beginning again. Then there are all the back to school pictures of the kids the last few days. T stared school a couple of weeks ago – this is his last year – sigh. Plus in high school there is no room parties to volunteer to be a room mom at, no family fun nights at school, no open house where the kids are so excited to show you their new desk and introduce you to their newest teacher.
I do understand that I have a lot of wonderful things in my life. I appreciate them all. But still, sometimes, I still just want to have that little baby to snuggle with, or the toddler to tuck into bed, or the young ones to bring me home an “I love mom” craft project home from school. Planning the perfect Halloween costume, making plans to see Santa, helping them create a fun box for their Valentine’s at school, and going to school to see them perform in the elementary school spring concert. Sigh.
When I tell people about my baby envy they say “you can borrow mine”, but it is not the same. I do have my wonderful nephew Colby to spoil, but again it is not the same. Yes, I can volunteer and various agencies and schools to enjoy time with other’s children too, it’s just not the same as my own though.
Have you been through this?
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